Andy

Team Croquet

Quite unexpectedly, we had a great turnout for croquet today. 8 of us took to the field in teams of two in the middle of the afternoon to pit our skills against each other. The match was quite competitive for about a quarter of the course, and things opened up thereafter.

Teams Chiappa and Knapp jumped into the lead while teams Lawrence and Mosmiller languished for an extended period around one brutally-placed wicket. My partner and fellow CFS sufferer Ann-Marie, though new to the game, stepped forward with some brilliant shotmaking, keeping us at least within earshot of those in the lead. Apparently I have quite a fearsome reputation on the croquet field after all these years, and this drove the leading pairs to commit the most grievous infraction of the rules of power croquet possible.

They... ::gasp::... Cooperated.

The foul stench of cooperation is still clinging to my clothing like cigarette smoke. Joe Chiappa and Amanda Bange came away with the victory. G.B. and his wife Heidi battled with Ann-Marie and me for the coveted 3rd place position and wound up beating us out by one or two shots, leaving us in last place. Humiliating!

To be honest, Joe and Amanda would have likely come away with the victory regardless of the "cooperation" incident. Their lead was substantial, and though Ann-Marie pulled through with numerous miraculous shots, I was for the most part unable to hit the broad side of a barn this afternoon. G.B. seemed to be in the same predicament. I kept telling him to let his baby Maggie take shots for him, but he stubbornly refused.

Obviously all of these people who decided to beat me at my own game will be banned from ever returning. Hopefully they enjoyed their last burger feast at Rancho Mosmillero, because it's never happening again... at least until the next pleasant weekend when everyone is free.

Heidi, those banana-chocolate chip concoctions were fantastic. Amanda, thanks for the rolls even though you had to scoot. Kevin, your drink procuring ability is second to none, and that goes for Joe's ice-making ability as well. Mom and dad, you once again managed to provide a fantastic spread for us lazy croquet-playing bums. Thanks!

... but don't think for a minute that I will forget this last place humiliation. I will be back to take my revenge. You had better start practicing your water-shots now, because you're all going into the creek at our next encounter!